I don’t develop this blog, or spend enough time on it, because I don’t think of myself as a blogger.

I don’t tag my posts, generally, because I sort of think of them as private, like diary entries.  That’s the kind of self-publicist I am.

Yet I come back, and come back:  I add new stuff……..

There are people out there with action plans for life:  I know it; heavens, haven’t I met the finest examples?  People with no reticence whatever, who will unhesitatingly stand on street corners waving their book in the air – who will make unsolicited approaches to anyone and everyone anywhere:  on buses, at front doors, even in restrooms if necessary, to further their cause.  I am not one of these.  I curl up inside at the thought of inconveniencing anyone, let alone asking them to part with money.

Yet I keep writing, and writing:  why?  I want to entertain; I want to be read.

Bored already?  Please feel free to switch away now, because there’s more.

Within the compass of my limited early experience with the theatre I learned quickly that most of the greatest actors are introverts.  In as much as a generalisation can ever be drawn you could say they collectively hate doing interviews, making personal appearances, or any form of contact with a fan base.   Yet they love their profession; they love to act!  Why?  Because….

No, I’m not trying to draw any parallel between my poor talents and those gifted with greatness; far from it.  I’m bringing this up because I am getting into the second half of my ‘action plan’ for this year and entering the fearsome business of finding (or trying to find) an agent.

Tragic as I am I still have upon my wall, nailed with tacks that are rusted now, a copy of the Desiderata – remember that piece of ‘seventies pop philosophy? 

‘You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here’

Well, anonymous citizen of Baltimore, when I scan the lists, when I read the proprietorial ‘requirements for submission’ , when I am confronted by the formidable author talent apparently flooding each agent’s books, I do not feel I have a right to be here.  I feel, in fact, like slipping back beneath my stone and shuffling a little bank of defensive sand up in front of me.

And here I will squat, with my computer specially adapted for molluscs, splattering away at the keys creating manuscripts no-one will read…..

How many, I wonder, out there, bad, indifferent, good, or superb, will pass unread?  How many masterpieces are destroyed by a quick trip to the waste bin because they venture to raise their head from the ignominy  of the ‘slush pile’ just at the moment the ‘phone rings, or it is time for lunch?

So, time to load up the best quality paper!  Why?  Because…..

7 Comments

  1. It’s ironic that what fuels the passion for writing includes the desire to lock one’s self away for hours and get lost inside his or her head. Many of us who do that are indeed introverts, as you point out. But then, that same introspective hider is expected to face the masses and push his/her product, a figurative oxymoron really. I’ve found that through blogging, one can do that peripherally, without being so, “Hey, check out my book!” The act is also easier behind a screen rather than in front of another face. But come time to pedal my book to local bookstores, and–yikes–maybe even hold a book signing? This introvert can’t fathom that yet. But I guess I better. Because in a couple months, that’s just what I’ll need to do…

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    1. Yes, I know it has to be done. Dire, though, isn’t it? Perhaps you could rig up some sort of screen, maybe, with two holes for your hands….? No, silly idea. I think I’ll just bribe someone else to do it for me.

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  2. ‘You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here’
    I love that line! I could just breathe those words in and feel better. I’m not much of a tag person as well. I’m not sure why I’m just not a big fan of tags. When I read this the thought The reluctant Blogger came to mind. It’s funny once blogging gets under your skin you become a blogger wheather you want to blog or not. :+)

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    1. My thoughts exactly. The Desiderata has been a sort of life model for me for a lot of years. It is full of quotable stuff – I also like: ‘….neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass’

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